Now that summer has ended, so has my fling. My summer fling (SF) and I capped the summer off with SF meeting my parents before SF left to travel. My summer was action-packed, with much thanks to SF. I don’t remember our initial encounter a few months ago, but I do remember our first ‘social’ activity outside crossfit. We met for drinks. SF’s friends, my friends, we all met. That night went so well that we met up the next day for an afternoon of shopping. And the rest is, as they say, was history.
SF was good for me. SF introduced me to new things and adventures like pho, and boating through False Creek. Both activities seem ‘normal’ for Vancouverites. After 12 years in this City, it’s safe to say I’m a just a late bloomer to simple living. Most importantly, SF taught me that not everyone is exhausting, and I need to give people the benefit of the doubt (of not annoying me).
Usually, when I meet new people, I find it draining. From small talk to explaining myself/experiences/etc, it’s always something I avoided. I used to even ‘schedule’ weekly me-time as an opportunity to re-energize myself. Over the years, I’ve become jaded. I just avoided all people as a mean to avoid the draining ones.
I’m a very strong introvert, and I strongly exude the common traits. Huffington Post’s 23 Signs You Are Secretly An Introvert describes me quite well. Way too often introverts are assumed to be socially inept/shy. I’m far from both. People like me. I can’t help it. Often I will let people believe that I am shy if excuses me from socializing with people or doing something I don’t necessarily find fun or interesting. Awful, I know.
What it really comes down to is, yes, I’m an introvert who’s got awesome interpersonal skills. Hiding behind labels, as Walden would say, is just a cop out. He’s right (our convo from June still haunts me!). Sure, on paper I’m an introvert, and I do find some people exhausting. But I can’t generalize. I need to be a better judge of character. I need to be selective of who I engage with, and do what fulfills me.
And, relax. SF is just a female friend. She has promised to return to Vancouver next year, albeit with her boyfriend. We’ll see what he thinks of me being the third wheel.
(1) Don’t let labels define you.
(2) Don’t paint everyone with the same brush.