Last weekend, I met up with two friends who had never even heard of each other before then. My anxiety levels were high. Okay, fine. I may have even had a minor panic attack at the thought of being the glue between us three. I don’t do well with inter-mingling friends or networking simply because I get worked up about who will and won’t hit it off.
We started with drinks at Kal’s place. During the entire time, I was trying to carry two conversations –one with the guys, and one in my head. In the latter, irrational me was overanalyzing body language, short spurts of silence in the conversation, and everything else I could possibly fixate on, and rational me was telling me to just chill out because the conversation was flowing naturally.
A little while later, we made our way to Club Five Sixty. “lD, please,” says the doorman. Oh sh!t. For the first time ever, I forgot my ID. Did this really have to happen tonight? The guys offered to head elsewhere, but we all knew that I would need my ID for other venues as well. So, I left Arun and Kal to entertain each other while I headed back to the ‘burbs to get my ID. At this point, I could care less on how big of an idiot I was. I was too busy obsessing over the fact that I had left Arun and Kal together.
An hour later, I was back downtown and in the club. The guys were fine. Of course they were. They are both socially ept, and awesome. They would’ve bailed if things were awful, but instead we continued our night hitting up Barcelona, Hooker’s Green, and Tsui Hangs,
So simple, and yet so over-complicated in my head.
Up until recently, I never would put extra effort into making group-friend-nights, and this strategy worked, but was failing me now simply because I couldn’t keep up with all the separate social outings (time/effort/budget); they were taking away from my tv time.
With age, I, like many others, consolidated my friends. I have shed the fake friends/relationships. And, now that I’m surrounded by people I actually like, it’s given me confidence in knowing that I know good people, and good people tend to play nice with each other.
(1) I look so young for my age that that the doorman was adamant he needed proof I was over 19 (I choose to see past his legal responsibility).
(2) New friendships were formed because I let go of my neurotic thoughts.
(3) I had an awesome night out.